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On the whole, human beings want to be good, but not too good, and not quite all the time.
To see what is in front of one's nose needs a constant struggle.
All you need to start an asylum, is an empty room and the right kind of people.
A leader who keeps his ear to the ground allows his rear end to become a target.
I'm never going to be famous. My name will never be writ large on the roster of Those Who Do Things. I don't do anything. Not one single thing. I used to bite my nails, but I don't even do that anymore.
I'm not offended by dumb blonde jokes, because I know I'm not dumb. I also know I'm not blonde.
If I were running the world, I'd have it rain only between 2 and 5 a.m. Anyone out then ought to get wet.
I'm always doing things I can't do. That's how I get to do them.
When I was a child, my mother said to me, 'If you become a soldier, you'll be a general, and if you become a monk, you'll end up as the Pope.,' Instead, I became a painter and wound up as Picasso.
Look out, honey, cause I'm usin' technology; ain't got time to make no apology.
Mister, I was made for it.
Grown-ups never understand anything for themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them.
The regularity of a habit is generally in proportion to its absurdity.
All right, they're on our left, they're on our right, they're in front of us, they're behind us. They can't get away this time!