|Home||Play Sudoku||Play Mahjong||Amusing Quotes||Admiral|
New Amusing Quotesnew quotes
more new quotes
even more new quotes
Amusing Quotes Grouped by Author Last NameA
U thru Z
Amusing Quotes by Author
Last Name Starts With G or H
I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things. The glass is always half empty. And cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth.
Success is a lousy teacher. It seduces smart people into thinking they can't lose.
The meek will inherit the earth, but not the mineral rights.
The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that, you've got it made.
Create like a god, screw up like a man, grovel like a dog.
Not that I mind a slight case of abduction now and then, but I have tickets for the theater this evening ... and I get, well, kind of unreasonable about things like that.
My formula for living is quite simple. I get up in the morning and I go to bed at night. In between, I occupy myself as best I can.
You miss 100 per cent of the shots you never take.
Attention. Here's an update on tonight's dinner. It was veal. I repeat, veal. The winner of tonight's mystery meat contest is Jeffery Corbin, who guessed 'some kind of beef.'
Expect everything, and anything seems nothing. Expect nothing, and anything seems everything.
I do unto others what they do unto me, only worse.
I may have faults, but being wrong isn't one of them.
If you can not answer a man's argument, all is not lost, you can still call him vile names.
The man who doesn't relax and hoot a few hoots voluntarily, now and then, is in great danger of hooting hoots and standing on his head for the edification of the pathologist and trained nurse, a little later on.
More progress results from the violent execution of an imperfect plan than the perfection of a plan to violently execute.
I do not weep at the world. I am too busy sharpening my oyster knife.
Browse More Amusing Quotes by Author Last Name