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Amusing Quotes Grouped by Author Last Name

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Amusing Quotes by Author

Last Name Starts With G or H

I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things. The glass is always half empty. And cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth.
      — Janeane Garofalo, actress

Success is a lousy teacher. It seduces smart people into thinking they can't lose.
      — Bill Gates

The meek will inherit the earth, but not the mineral rights.
      — J. Paul Getty, Tycoon; American industrialist

The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that, you've got it made.
      — Jean Giraudoux, French writer

Create like a god, screw up like a man, grovel like a dog.
      — Peter N. Glaskowsky

Not that I mind a slight case of abduction now and then, but I have tickets for the theater this evening ... and I get, well, kind of unreasonable about things like that.
      — Cary Grant in the film "North By Northwest"

My formula for living is quite simple. I get up in the morning and I go to bed at night. In between, I occupy myself as best I can.
      — Cary Grant

You miss 100 per cent of the shots you never take.
      — Wayne Gretzky

Attention. Here's an update on tonight's dinner. It was veal. I repeat, veal. The winner of tonight's mystery meat contest is Jeffery Corbin, who guessed 'some kind of beef.'
      — Tripper Harrison, a character in the 1979 film Meatballs

Expect everything, and anything seems nothing. Expect nothing, and anything seems everything.
      — Samuel Hazo, poet

I do unto others what they do unto me, only worse.
      — Jimmy Hoffa, late union leader

I may have faults, but being wrong isn't one of them.
      — Jimmy Hoffa, late union leader

If you can not answer a man's argument, all is not lost, you can still call him vile names.
      — Elbert Hubbard, 19th-century author

The man who doesn't relax and hoot a few hoots voluntarily, now and then, is in great danger of hooting hoots and standing on his head for the edification of the pathologist and trained nurse, a little later on.
      — Elbert Hubbard, philosopher

More progress results from the violent execution of an imperfect plan than the perfection of a plan to violently execute.
      — Hubert Humphrey

I do not weep at the world. I am too busy sharpening my oyster knife.
      — Zora Neale Hurston, writer and anthropologist

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